


Ready For Love.

by WhisperLucifer



Series: First Love. [1]
Category: EXO (Band), SHINee
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe, Angst, Bullying, Drama, Fluff, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-06
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-10-05 07:02:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17320232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhisperLucifer/pseuds/WhisperLucifer
Summary: Jongin is eighteen, and waiting anxiously for his first ever date.





	Ready For Love.

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first taekai fic I'm re-uploading and I've decided to make it a little series, as I had a few people asking me for more parts when it was first posted.  
> Chanyeol is an ass in this story, I'm sorry. I love him really ^^  
> Please enjoy! ♡♡

 

*****

It’s approaching seven in the evening one Friday in May, and Jongin is seated in a relatively private corner of an increasingly busy restaurant in Seoul, gaze alternating between glancing around the stylish but cosy room, and down at his watch, each second that goes by does nothing to quell the nervous fluttering of his heart.

For what must be the hundredth time since he got changed after college, Jongin checks his clothes for creases, hoping that his choice of outfit – white slim fit jeans, and a lemon yellow, long sleeved t-shirt – isn’t too _under_ whelming. Spring is definitely beginning to give way to summer, the evenings are filled with low slanting sunshine, the nights warmer and free of the chill that has blanketed the city over the last few months, and so Jongin decided to wear something simple; even the dark chocolate brown of his hair is simply tousled with a bit of his sister’s hairspray.

Jongin is eighteen, and waiting anxiously for his first ever date; Chanyeol, the tall, dark and handsome guy from his psychology class he’s been crushing on since first semester.

Jongin has been the victim of bullying since pretty much his first day of kindergarten, even now at college, there’s so many people who seem to hate him just for existing, - the way he looks, speaks, his interests, even his skin colour, you name it, he’s been mocked for it – and as such romance has never really played a huge role in his life.

Or any role, in all honesty and so when the people around him started dating, Jongin was simply left standing alone on the outside, wondering why nobody wanted him too. So he had drowned himself in the world of fictional romance, reading book after book, watching movie after movie, losing himself in worlds where love always prevails, and each person has a _one,_ a soulmate that is destined to be theirs forever.

After years of fictional relationships, of daydreaming about what it would be like to have somebody hold him and kiss him, perhaps even make love to him with a fiery passion that will never burn out, Jongin hopes that finally, _finally_ , it’s his turn to stop dreaming, and start _experiencing_.

“Good evening sir, my name is Taemin and I will be your waiter tonight. Would you like a drink, or perhaps the complimentary bread basket, while you look at our menu?”

Jongin’s thoughts are interrupted by the waiter now standing by his table setting a menu down in front of him- dressed in a crisp white shirt and smart black pants, light brown hair falling straight and smooth around his face; the brunette would have to be blind not to see how attractive this stranger – this _Taemin_ – really is.

“Sir?” he says when Jongin doesn't answer him, speechless for a moment or two.

Jongin blushes, embarrassed, “Oh, um-“ he pauses when the waiter gazes at him expectantly, eyes so dark and fathomless he has to look away, “Just water for now, please. I’m waiting for somebody… a date.”

The heat in his face tells him that his unexpected words have only succeeded in deepening his embarrassment; Jongin really hates being so shy sometimes.

Taemin smiles, and sets another menu down on the other side of the table, “A menu for your partner, then. I’ll be right back with your water.”

A polite bow, and then Taemin is gone, leaving Jongin to absently bounce his right leg nervously under the table as he watches the seconds drop off the elegant looking clock hanging high on the far wall; Chanyeol will be here any minute.

The thought has Jongin internally panicking all over again, hands tightly gripping the small bouquet of brightly coloured tulips he bought from a florist before coming here, wanting to show Chanyeol that he’s serious about dating him but at the same time not be too extravagant; he doesn't really know what he’s doing so he doesn't want to scare off the only person who’s ever wanted to take him on a date by acting wrongly or saying something stupid.

Seven o’clock comes and goes, Jongin drinks the water Taemin brought for him and politely refuses the bread basket for the second time, though he finds himself scanning the menu whilst he waits, wondering what will be a good meal choice for a first date.

_Chanyeol where are u?_

_Is everything ok?_

_Did I get the time wrong? U did say 7, right?_

_Am I in the wrong restaurant?_

“Please answer me.” Jongin whispers to his phone when his fourth text message goes unanswered.

Chanyeol is almost an hour late, and Jongin doesn't understand what’s going on, doesn't know why his classmate isn’t answering his messages after giving him his phone number so that they could contact one another.

Putting his phone down on the table, Jongin sighs heavily, deciding to wait a little longer before calling him.

_Everyone runs late sometimes_ Jongin tells himself, fingers tracing the tulip petals gently, _he said he wanted to take me on a date, so he’ll be here soon. I know he will._

Though the voice of his subconscious sounds defiant and strong, Jongin’s insecurities are already beginning to eat him alive, because he’s terrified that he’s done something to screw this up before it’s even started.

He smiles bravely, brightly when Taemin brings him another glass of water, complete with ice, a slice of lemon and a straw, “My date is… they’re running late so- I think I will have that bread basket while I wait. If that’s okay.”

Taemin nods, smiling warmly, “Of course, sir.”

When eight o’clock soon becomes nine – and Jongin’s eaten his way through several different types of delicious baked bread - and there’s still no sign of Chanyeol, Jongin feels self-conscious and stupid, sitting there by himself at a table set for two, in a busy restaurant on a Friday night.

Leaving his flowers at the table, Jongin goes to the restroom where it’s quieter, dialling Chanyeol’s number and frowning when it goes straight to answer phone.

“Hey Chanyeol, it’s Jongin. I’ve been waiting at our table for almost two hours and I don't mean to sound pushy but, where are you?” Jongin speaks to the silence on the other end of the line, “Did I mix the days up? Did you mean next Friday and not tonight? Please, call me back.” 

Hanging up and trying to ignore the fear shivering up his spine, Jongin heads back out into the main restaurant, resuming his seat at the table he booked the same day Chanyeol agreed to this date almost a week ago.

This time, when Taemin approaches his table, he can’t even force a smile.

“Sir, I’m sorry to have to say this but the restaurant is very busy and we have customers waiting to be seated so if you’re not going to be ordering, I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to wait at the bar.”

Jongin is so embarrassed he actually feels tearful, “I’m so sorry, I don't mean to be in the way I-“ he rambles, not knowing what to do, “I don't know where… I called but there’s no answer and- fifteen minutes. Can I please have another fifteen minutes? Then if they-“ his voice cracks a little, “If they don't show, I’ll leave.”

A look of sympathy passes across the handsome waiter’s face. “No problem, sir.”

Jongin sighs, gratefully, “Thank you.”

When those fifteen minutes passes by with still no word from Chanyeol, Jongin collects his things and heads out of the restaurant with an increasingly heavy heart, pausing at the door to tell a member of staff that his table is now free.

“Chanyeol hey,” Jongin says to the answer phone once more, “it’s me again. The restaurant got busy so I had to give up our table, but I’m waiting outside for you now…in case you decide to show. Please show Chanyeol, please.” _Don't reject me already_ are the words he doesn't dare speak.

As the evening darkens into night, Jongin shivers in the cool breeze shifting across the city, wrapping his arms around himself the best he can whilst clutching the now wilting tulips and his phone in an effort to keep warm, the brightly lit screen telling him that it’s almost eleven, and the restaurant will be closing soon.

He doesn't even know why he’s still here, waiting around like a naïve fool when it’s not like the obvious hasn't hit him already. Chanyeol isn’t coming, he’s been stood up.

“Aren’t you cold, standing around out here?”

The sound of Taemin’s voice makes Jongin jump, and he wipes at the tears on his face before turning around to where the waiter is wiping down tables and tipping up the chairs now empty after being occupied through the warmth of the late spring sun.

Jongin shrugs, “I think I’m mainly just numb.”

“Your date never showed?” Taemin asks, though he doesn't stop what he’s doing, as though sensing that Jongin might crumple under the pressure of a direct conversation when he’s feeling so vulnerable and embarrassed.

“No. Better things to do I guess, didn't want me after all.” The brunette stares at the sky as he blinks back tears, “Not that I’m surprised, _nobody_ ever wants me.”

Love has deemed him unworthy once again.

Taemin straightens up, looking at him with dark eyes full of a surprising amount of concern, considering they’re complete strangers. “I’m sure that’s not true.” He says firmly, “Your date probably had something come up that couldn't be avoided, perhaps a family matter, and they’ve just not had chance to get in touch with you to explain and apologise yet.” he says with a warm smile. “You’d be surprised how many times I’ve seen that happen, working here.”

Despite the cold, Jongin is warmed by Taemin’s reassurances, nodding in agreement at the handsome waiter, “You’re probably right, maybe somebody at home is ill or something.”

Unfortunately for Jongin and his open, hopeful heart that sometimes leaves him vulnerable, that’s when Chanyeol finally _does_ show up. With a group of his friends he recognises from around campus.

_Guess it’s not a sick mother or something then_ Jongin thinks, heart quivering when Chanyeol starts laughing to his friends as they make their way over, “See guys,” he smirks, his taller figure suddenly imposing on the ever darkening street. “I told you he’d still be here, waiting.”

Jongin doesn't understand what’s going on. “What do you mean?” he asks, praying for his voice to hold steady.

“Well that _is_ what you’re doing, right Jongin?” Chanyeol says, “Waiting here for me.”

“Of course I waited Chanyeol, we arranged to meet here for our date.” Jongin says, throat constricting when he notices the way the group share amused glances, “I was worried because you’re so late and- why did you bring your friends with you?”

For some reason, Jongin can sense that Taemin is still there, quietly cleaning tables but keeping an eye on the situation at the same time; it makes him wonder if Taemin can sense something he can’t.

“Honestly Jongin, did you _really_ think that I would go on a date with _you_?” Chanyeol says, and Jongin visibly flinches, face crumpling, “Oh my God, you _did_ , didn't you?” his tone is as mocking as his laugh, “How cute.”

The guys Chanyeol is flanked by all laugh then, and Jongin can barely see through the tears swimming in his eyes because he just doesn't understand why this is happening, doesn't know what he’s done wrong.

“Chanyeol why are you being that this? I don't understand,” Jongin’s voice trembles as he speaks, emotion a lump of lead in his throat, “You said you wanted to go on a date- said you wanted _me!_ ”

Chanyeol laughs harder still. “Why the hell would I want you Jongin, when the most attractive thing about you is the flowers in your hand, and even then, they look like you tore them out of the ground several days ago.”

Chest heaving in silent turmoil, Jongin tries to speak. “I j-just t-thought th- th- that you’d-“ the stammer he’s worked so hard for years to get under control resurfaces, the way it always does when he’s hurting.

“Listen to him, the freak can’t even get his words out now.” Chanyeol snipes, mocking him with imitations of his speech, “Is that enough of a reason to stay as far away from you as possible, or shall I continue?”

Jongin shakes his head, tears on his face. “N-n-no…pl-please d-don't.”

Obviously Chanyeol ignores him, seemingly enjoying the humiliation he’s crushing Jongin’s fragile spirit with. “Just look at yourself Jongin, the way you’re dressed,” the teenager glances down at his choice of outfit, “Yellow and white, seriously, what are you- a giant lemon meringue?”

The resounding laughter is like poison arrows to Jongin’s chest.

"Were you planning of us having a whole three course meal too?” Chanyeol continues carelessly as though he isn’t crushing a human being beneath his shoes with his words.  


Jongin nods silently despite himself, _I thought it would be romantic._

“Thought so, I wouldn't if I were you though, you’re not exactly the skinniest guy I’ve ever met,” Chanyeol laughs, “You should probably just not eat anything at all, starve yourself to death or something actually useful.”

A sob wrenches free as Jongin’s heart splits down the middle, and he wraps his arms around himself subconsciously, one of the carefully chosen flowers falling noiselessly from the bouquet to the floor.

Jongin is about to beg Chanyeol to stop this humiliation, or just punch him and get it over with if he hates him so much, but then Taemin is stepping between them, and Jongin stands there dumbfounded as the waiter stares up at Chanyeol with such malevolence it kind of makes Jongin want to back away himself.

“You’ve had your fun, but enough is enough now.” Taemin says, voice polite but firm. “Your comments are inappropriate and unnecessary and the restaurant is closing so you’re all going to have to leave. Right now.”

Chanyeol jabs Taemin in the chest with a pointed finger, hard. “And what exactly are _you_ going to do to make us?”

Taemin glances down at Chanyeol’s hand then back to his face, their gazes locking. “Nothing, except call the police and tell them that you’re refusing to leave the restaurant premises after closing after which you’ll spend at least a night in a cell. How does that sound?” 

Jongin sees fear ripple through the group of bullies for the first time, and though Chanyeol scoffs and rolls his eyes, he holds his hands up and steps away, “Whatever, we were leaving anyway.” The group move away, but Chanyeol turns back once more, “I asked you on a date Jongin, to see how easy you were to get into bed, but then I realised I couldn't stomach it, didn't want to spend the rest of the night sick after having to actually _touch_ you.”

With that the group leave, and Jongin curses the Fates for deeming it so that he lives such a pitiful existence that’s coloured grey with the absence of the love he’s always dreamed of having.

“Hey, Jongin, right?” Taemin says quietly as he turns to face him. “This is probably a bit of a redundant question but, are you okay?” he asks when Jongin manages a nod.

Trying to wipe his constantly falling tears from his cheeks, Jongin nods again. “I s-should probably l-leave too,” he stutters, wishing for the ground to just open up and swallow him, “You’re c-closing.”

Checking that he’s still got the few things he brought with him, Jongin dumps the sad looking flowers in a nearby trashcan, “I told you n-nobody ever w-w-wants me.”

Jongin makes to leave, and only stops when Taemin grasps his arm gently. “You don't have to leave, Jongin. I just wanted those jerks to back off- you should come back inside where it’s warmer and calm down for a while.”

Jongin is surprised by the other man’s compassion, “Th- thanks but-” he pauses, taking a deep breath to try and steady himself _and_ his words. “I’ve already w-wasted so much of your t-time tonight.”

Taemin shakes his head, that same warm smile from before curving his lips. “It’s not a waste, believe me, that guy Chanyeol has no idea what he’s talking about. You should at least come in and wait a while to make sure that group of morons don't come back.”

_That’s actually a good idea,_ Jongin thinks, he doesn't think he’d survive another humiliating encounter like that.

“O-okay Taemin, thanks.” Jongin says shyly, not really knowing what to make of this strange turn of events- he doesn't understand why a complete stranger would want to stand up for him and make him feel better when people he’s known years can’t be bothered to help shield him when the insecurities and anxieties get too much, weigh too heavily on his young shoulders.

He follows Taemin inside, anyway.

*****

“Here,” Taemin says, guiding him through the emptying restaurant to a table not far from staff quarters, pulling a seat out for him, “have a seat, and I’ll be right back.”

Jongin nods again, wiping at his tears as he watches Taemin disappear into the kitchens, before bowing his head in an effort to keep from accidentally making eye contact with anybody. The last thing he wants to do right now is draw attention to himself.

He can’t believe how naïve, how stupid he’s been actually believing that for just one moment, somebody might really, truly want him. Jongin doesn't understand himself anymore. Not why he’s been so desperate for Chanyeol’s attention in the first place when it’s not like he hasn't witnessed before how cruel he can be, nor does he know why even though his class mate has set his pulse racing on more than one occasion, just his first _glance_ at Taemin has his heart tripping over itself it beat so hard, pounding to a rhythm he doesn't recognise.

It makes him feel like a fake though, like a fraud who doesn't deserve true feelings because he isn’t using them in the right way, hasn't got a fucking clue what he’s supposed to do with himself now.

Go home and cry over Chanyeol’s rejection? Wish it were Taemin who had asked him out instead? Resign himself to a life of loneliness and a future house full of dogs because nobody will ever want a family with him?

The questions – the _reprimands_ – are endless.

Jongin’s thoughts are broken when Taemin reappears not five minutes later, and sets a caramel hot chocolate down in front of him, “The sugar might help.” He supplies at Jongin’s questioning gaze. “It’s on the house, and I made it myself.”

Jongin feels himself flush hotly, not knowing how to deal with the unexpected kindness. “T-thanks so much.”

Taemin smiles brightly. “Anytime,” he glances around the restaurant, occupied now only by staff, and a few customers finishing their drinks and paying for their meals, “Will you be okay while I finish closing up? I won’t be long.”

Jongin manages a shy smile of his own. “I’ll be f-fine.”

Another smile and a small bow, and Taemin is sweeping around the restaurant, clearing tables and giving directions to other staff, his body lithe beneath his clothes, movements fluid like water. Jongin is transfixed.

_He’s so gorgeous_ Jongin finds himself thinking, promptly blushing to his hairline at his own thoughts and busying himself with his drink, eyes staring determinedly at the dark wood of the table partially hidden by a crisp white tablecloth.

_What the hell is wrong with me?_ Jongin mentally scolds himself _I’ve just been humiliated by Chanyeol, and now I’ve got butterflies thanks to the damned waiter who witnessed it. I’m insane!_

He’s so wrapped up in chastising himself that he doesn't notice either his empty cup being taken away or Taemin disappear again until he’s standing by his table, changed out of his work clothes, into a fitted black turtleneck sweater, skin tight black jeans, boots to match and a leather jacket of the same ebony shade slung over one arm, his hair now pushed back to reveal more of his face. The whole look is so effortlessly sexy Jongin doesn't know what to do with himself.

“If you’re feeling better, we can get out of here if you like?” Taemin asks, that same easy smile on his lips that makes Jongin want to stare and look away at the same time.

“Yes, much better, t-thanks for the drink.” He says quietly, glancing around the restaurant it’s then he realises the place is empty and he’s alone with a complete stranger late at night.

_Oh my God, what the hell am I doing? I must be crazy; he could be a psychopath for all I know!_

“I’m not a serial killer, if that’s what you’re worried about,” Taemin almost smirks, as if reading his mind. “I’m actually the manager so I close up a lot, we were just short staffed tonight so I helped out, y’know, instead of being one of those managers who just points his finger at people to get them to do everything for him.”

Jongin smiles, though he’s still unsure. “Well, I’m glad we c-cleared that up, though isn’t that exactly what a s-serial killer _would_ say, that they’re not insane or anything, they just want to h-help?”

Taemin laughs softly, motioning for them to leave. “Perhaps,” he holds the door open for Jongin to leave first, “I guess you’re just going to have to trust me.”

“For some reason,” Jongin says shyly, proud that his stutter is easing quickly tonight. “I already do.”

Taemin doesn't reply, but smiles as he finishes locking up, though it soon turns into a frown when he notices Jongin shivering on the sidewalk; despite the change in season, the nights are still rather cold sometimes.

“You’re cold,” Taemin states, “Take this.”

Jongin actually feels a little lightheaded when Taemin wraps the leather jacket around his shoulders, filling his body with warmth and his senses with the scent of sensual masculinity. It's something he immediately decides is uniquely Taemin.

He wonders if some drugs really can have you hooked after the first hit.

“Why are you being so nice to me?” Jongin blurts out of the blue as they walk down the street together, their destination unknown to him.

Taemin glances at him, “Is there any reason why I shouldn't be?”

“Well, I caused a bit of a scene outside your restaurant and-“ he pauses, unsure again, “Chanyeol is obviously a man so… you should be disgusted by me or something. Most other people are.”

“As I remember it, it was that jerk and his posse of morons causing the scene, not you.” Taemin tells him, voice turning gentle with his next words. “And I’ll tell you a secret, _all_ of my dates have been men.”

Jongin is confused for a moment, and then it hits him. “ _Oh_ , I see.” he blushes harder than ever.  


“Yeah, so now that’s cleared up, how about I take you to dinner?” Taemin asks, his confidence leaving Jongin in awe. “You must be hungry after waiting all that time and eating nothing but bread.”

“Dinner? But won’t most places be closed now?”

Taemin shakes his head, lips curved into another smirk that has Jongin suddenly wishing he could kiss him. “The best restaurant in the whole city is open almost all night.”

“It is?” Jongin asks, to which Taemin nods.

“So, you want to go?” Taemin quirks an eyebrow.

Jongin doesn't know what’s happening, doesn't know what he’s getting himself into, but in that moment – after the disaster of a night he’s had so far – he decides he doesn't care.

“Sure,” Jongin smiles, holding the other man’s jacket around himself a little tighter. “let’s go.”

“This way then.”

Jongin swears his fragile – and all too overeager – heart does several backflips when Taemin takes his free hand in his own, squeezing gently as he leads them to the end of the street and around the corner.

_Somebody better pinch me, because I’m sure as hell I must be dreaming._

*****

“ _This_ is the best restaurant in town?” Jongin exclaims, laughing when Taemin buys them several French-fry hotdogs and a pot each of raspberry ripple ice cream from a late night vendor just outside a large park.

Taemin smiles at him as he hands him his share of the food. “It might not be the Ritz, but this food is some of the tastiest I’ve had, and trust me, I’ve eaten a lot of different food.” he reaches out a free hand to gently brush strands of hair from Jongin's face. “People shouldn't judge by appearances, as you well know.”

Jongin actually feels a little ashamed of himself, for saying something so careless when Taemin is being nothing but sweet to him. “I’m sorry,” he mumbles, “It’s just- not what I expected, that’s all. I like it though.” He rushes to add, face burning.

“Let’s walk,” Taemin says, noticing that Jongin is still shivering a little, despite the heavy leather draped around him. “You’ll be warmer that way. Perhaps ice cream wasn't the best choice in dessert.”

Jongin smiles as he walks with Taemin into the darkened park. “But I love ice cream.”

Taemin laughs a little at his enthusiasm. “So Jongin, why don't you tell me a little about yourself.”

“What do you want to know?” Jongin asks, feeling nervous. “I’m not very good at talking about myself so…”

He trails off, unsure, hoping that Taemin will take the lead. Thankfully, he does. “Ah, question and answer then.” he pauses in thought. “How about work, or education?”

“I’m studying psychology and medicine,” Jongin tells the other man proudly, “I hope to be a psychiatrist in the future- I want to do something with my life that can be of help to others.”

If he’s not mistaken, Taemin looks impressed. “I’m sure you’ll make a brilliant doctor.”

“So what about you?” Jongin questions, wanting to be brave and keep the conversation going, “Have you always wanted to be the manager of a popular restaurant?”

Taemin laughs softly as he shakes his head, “No, not at all. Up until a few years ago, I was a professional dancer.”

Though there’s still a smile curving Taemin's lips, his eyes look suddenly sad and far away. “What happened?” Jongin’s frowns, knowing that it can’t be anything good.

“I was practicing before traveling with rest of my dance group, working out the kinks in some intense choreography we’d never done before,” Taemin sighs heavily. “Long story short, I did a somersault, landed wrong and blew out my left knee. My career ended pretty much overnight, and my parents decided that it was time I looked for a _real job_ , and this is where it got me. Managing a restaurant and daydreaming about stage lights and heavy bass lines.”

The brutal honesty makes Jongin’s chest feel unexpectedly tight. “Do you not dance at all now?”

“I can, but rarely do.” Another sigh. “Wow, leave it to me to darken the mood,” Taemin laughs, looking a little flustered for the first time.

“Don't worry about it, I’m glad you told me.” Jongin assures him, being uncharacteristically bold and reaching for Taemin’s hand to squeeze it tightly, “I bet you’re a wonderful dancer.”

“Perhaps one day I’ll show you.” Taemin tells him, confident smirk back in its rightful place. “Let you decide for yourself.”

“I’d like that.”

_I’d like that a lot._

Walking around the park, illuminated by the soft yellow lamps glowing along the edges of the path as they eat their late night food, the two men continue their line of questioning in an effort to get to know one another better.

Jongin learns that other than dance, Taemin has a love for anime, horror movies, playing billiards, he loves travelling, his favourite colour is red and despite several attempts at a serious relationship, has always been unlucky in love. In return Jongin shares that he’s obsessed with science fiction movies, reads an embarrassing amount of romance novels, falls in love at first sight with any and all breeds of dog, doesn't have a favourite colour but his lucky number is eight and that sadly, romance has always eluded him, left him alone.

It’s nice, Jongin thinks, having somebody who seems to genuinely _want_ to get to know him.

“This is the strangest first date ever.” Jongin says without thinking, then promptly blushes when he realises what he’s said. “I mean not that I’ve ever had a date before or t-that I think this i-is even a d-date I just-“

“I’m turning twenty-five in a few months,” Taemin interrupts, gazing at him intensely. “So tell me Jongin, is it okay for us to call this a first date?”

It takes a second for Jongin to catch on to Taemin’s meaning, and when he does, his heart plummets into his stomach when he realises that Taemin is almost seven years older than him.

_This is probably going to ruin any chance I might have had, but I can’t lie to him_ , Jongin decides, taking a deep breath in an attempt to steel himself for rejection. “I… I only t-turned eighteen in J-January.” He curses the reappearance of his nervous stutter. “I know that’s a b-bit of a g-gap but I promise I’m not i-immature just- _insecure_ a l-lot and…” he trails off, averting his eyes to the floor when he doesn't know what to say without sounding like more of an idiot than he already does.

Taemin is a _grown man_ , one who most likely doesn't want to waste his time with an insecure, inexperienced teenager.

“It is my belief.” Taemin says quietly, reaching out to tilt Jongin’s chin back up so their eyes meet. “That if a person so wishes, eighteen is old enough to be independent, make their own choices and know what they want.”

_I want you_ he wants to say, but the words won’t articulate. They sound ridiculous and far too bold even inside his head, so Jongin stays quiet.

“Personally,” Taemin continues, not seeming at all offended by Jongin’s silence. “I’d like this to be a date.” He smiles at the way the Jongin actually gasps out loud. “I’d also like to know what it is about this date that seems strange to you, other than the fact that we’ve just met.”

Mentally slapping himself back to his senses, Jongin flushes for what has to be the twentieth time in the last half an hour, cursing that he can no longer hide behind his food because the now empty packets are already in the trash. “I think that _is_ what’s strange.” He starts, “We don't know each other at all so we’re kind of talking about everything all at once… we only just met so this date is happening quickly also and- well I came here to go on a date with another guy who turned out to be a total jackass.”

He’s relived – and also proud – when he speech remains steady despite his nervous rambling. His heart skips a beat when Taemin laughs softly.

“I see your point,” Taemin tells him, “I guess I’ll just have to do something to make this date more like the ones you read about in your books.”

Jongin is about to ask what he means by that, but before he can even open his mouth Taemin is kissing him - soft and chaste and beautiful – his lips only lingering for a moment before pulling away with a smirk, though he reaches between them to hold Jongin’s hand once more.

Jongin is sure his face must resemble the colour of the raspberry in the ice cream he’s just eaten, and he swears he actually _floats_ through the park as they continue their stroll. He briefly wonders if he should tell Taemin to get a kite string to tether him by his side so he doesn't disappear into the clouds somewhere.

Eventually they reach a decidedly wooded area of the park, where the trees are surrounded by flowers that don't seem to have realised that the sun has actually set- because some of them are still in full bloom even in the shadows; it’s beautiful really.

Jongin furrows his brow when he notices Taemin looking around as they come to a stop, his expression one of concentration. “Is everything okay?” he asks, unable to help himself.

“No.” Taemin says simply, but continues before Jongin can say anything, “If I was a character in one of the books that you love so much, it would be customary for me to bring you, as my date, some flowers to show that I was thinking of you and am taking things seriously. I don't have any flowers, so I’m unprepared.”

Though he shakes his head at Taemin’s quirkiness, Jongin is smiling. “It’s okay, you don’t have-“

“I can remedy that easy enough though,” Taemin interrupts, “I’ll be right back.”

Jongin watches in fascination as Taemin then wanders off towards the trees, bending every few seconds to pick seemingly every kind of wild flower he comes across. It makes Jongin feel a little emotional when Taemin then pulls a random elastic band from his pocket to bind the blooms together before heading back to him, holding the bouquet out. “For you.”

“Thank you so much, they’re lovely.” Jongin almost whispers, changing the subject before he starts crying or something else embarrassing. “Do you always carry elastic bands around with you for flower picking emergencies?”

Taemin laughs and Jongin feels like flying. “I always seem to have them on me, over the years I’ve developed a habit of just stuffing them into my pockets when I’m done with sorting papers at work.”

Jongin doesn't say anything, but in a moment of bravery, presses a quick kiss to Taemin’s cheek, being rewarded with a smile that takes his breath away and gives him butterflies in a way he’s never experienced before tonight.

“I know I should probably have asked sooner,” Taemin starts as they begin their walk back the way they came, still hand in hand, his tone more serious. “but are you really okay after seeing Chanyeol earlier? The things he said- I wanted to punch him.”

Jongin’s heart skitters excitedly at the possessiveness in Taemin’s voice. “It hurts, I’m not going to lie. It probably will for some time,” Jongin replies. “but I also can’t say that I’m not used to it. Ever since I was a kid, my appearance has been the subject of many mockeries.” He pauses, then decides to just tell the other man the truth. “Especially my skin, it’s why I usually cover it up as much as possible, or wear colours that don't make it stand out. But tonight I wanted to, I don't know, try and come out of my shell a bit? Clearly that was a mistake.”

“No, it wasn't. Chanyeol is just an idiot who doesn't know true beauty when it’s standing right in front of him.” Taemin tells him, stepping closer, “I however, am _not_ an idiot,” knuckles brush gently over the tan skin of Jongin’s cheekbone, “You're beautiful, Jongin. So don't you believe him, not even for a second.”

Jongin feels bashful all over again, unused to such compliments. “I’ll try.” _I've never been called beautiful before._  


“Were you- _are_ you in love with him?” Taemin asks, and Jongin is only mildly surprised by the question.

“No. I mean sure I liked him but no, I’m not in love with him.” Jongin assures him. “If I was, despite his rejection, I wouldn't be standing here with you.”

“Do you still have the napkin they gave you with your ice cream?”

The question is unexpected, and has Jongin feeling a little confused, but he nods, fishing the folded cream paper out of his pocket and handing to Taemin, who smiles and thanks him.

Jongin watches as Taemin then pulls a pen from his back pocket, scrawling something onto the paper before handing it back to him. Je goes dizzy when reads over the black ink to discover that it’s Taemin’s phone number.

“For just in case you ever want a second date.” Taemin supplies when Jongin remains speechless. “Or y’know, you can drop by the restaurant some time- whatever works for you.”

Jongin knows he’s frowning by the way Taemin looks suddenly worried. “Did I do something wrong? Was I too forward?”

“This is my first ever date, and that kiss we shared before? That was my first kiss too.” Jongin says, wondering if he’s making any sense. “I mean I’m-“ he pauses, embarrassed. “Taemin these things I’m sharing with you, they’re my _firsts_.”

Taemin smiles, easy and sexy, letting the younger man know that yes, he’s making sense. “One step at a time is fine Jongin, I’ll never push you, so don't ever worry about that.”

The tenderness in his voice is all the reassurance Jongin needs. “Then I’d love that second date.”

Hand in hand, they walk back to the main street, where Taemin insists on walking Jongin to his bus stop to _make sure he’s safe._ It’s an act of compassion that makes him feel warm and fuzzy all over.

“Here, your jacket.” Jongin says, making to shrug the leather off but stopping when Taemin shakes his head.

“Keep it.” He says. “It looks better on you anyway.”

Jongin smiles bashfully, still not quite able to comprehend that this is actually happening to him. “Thanks.”

“You have the loveliest smile.” Taemin compliments, making Jongin blush yet again. “I know you’ve been hurt, I know you have your insecurities, but I want you to remember that I think you’re beautiful Jongin, no matter what anybody else might say, you’re beautiful.”

Impulsively, Jongin moves to hug Taemin close – being careful not to crush his wildflowers - absorbing his warmth and breathing in his scent. Y _ou’re beautiful too_ , the embrace whispers silently.

As the bus pulls to a stop, Taemin kisses Jongin again, a little harder, lingering a little longer than before. “I’ll look forward to your call.”

“Goodnight Taemin.” Jongin says, securing the jacket around him again before turning away to board the bus.

In a daze, he sinks onto the nearest seat, waving at Taemin through the glass as the bus pulls away, only when he can’t see him any more does he return his attention to the colourful blooms Taemin gathered for him.

Smiling and feeling comfortable in his own skin for the first time in what seemed like forever, Jongin decides that facing Chanyeol on Monday isn't going to be so terrifying, and that maybe, just _maybe_ – he thinks with the taste of Taemin’s kiss still on his lips and the echo of his laughter in his ears - it is his time for romance after all.

And he’s more than ready for it, wherever it may lead him. Despite the unexpected twist of fate and the insecurities buried just beneath the surface of his skin-

Jongin is ready for _love_.

**~*~**

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know what you thought! ♡♡


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